I asked Grandmother about how to handle great conflict within ourselves -- especially conflicted "identities" -- when we struggle with which of the roles we play is the true role, how to be true to the self; with "who am I?"; with "Am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing?"; "What is the right thing to do?" -- the inner conflicts that can often hold up new steps of growth, decisions to take bold new positions or change our role in the world...
"Grandmother on How to Handle Great Conflict within Ourselves or with Others" was not quite the answer I expected -- and I greatly appreciated the steps and the meditation -- "what to do" to move into a different viewpoint, to open my heart, perhaps increase loving communication with others. Recorded/Posted 5-22-19 -- 12 minutes, 10 seconds.
Click Audio Player to play "Grandmother on How to Handle Great Conflict within Ourselves and with Others," Recorded/Posted 5-22-19, 12 minutes, 10 seconds. For greater impact, try reading and listening at the same time.
SHR: Grandmother, what do you see as key in handling a "conflicted identity" in this era? You may have one kind of response or relationship with one group, a different and contradictory kind of response or even "character" that we play with another group, trying to keep everyone happy. What do you see as key in turning "conflicting identities" into growth?
In a sense you are speaking of a conflicted communication within the "self," which is simply an opportunity to work with growth in the area of interconnectedness with all other beings. This is a gift.
If you can recognize that you, yourself, have conflicted identities within, even on the same decision or the same issue -- one moment you want to go in one direction and another moment you want to go another direction. And you feel a kind of conflict in the heart.
But do not despair, because this is how you come to recognize that if that conflict is within you, it can be settled within you as one being. and then you can translate that to understanding how to be so thoughtful of other beings that you can settle in your own mind, conflict with other beings. Do you see?
Other beings are no less conflicted than you are! Other beings also feel one way one day and another way another day. They may communicate with you very gently at one moment and another moment be short-tempered, have very little patience. This is you: You are these other beings that you view as opposite or conflicted or contrary -- and these beings are you!
The greatest lessons come when you, yourself, are conflicted, and eventually, it will occur to you that this is true of others.
Now, how do you use this very valuable piece of information? If you can meditate upon a process of finding common ground within disparate opinions or even characters that you play -- perhaps you play one at work and one at home and one with one set of friends and a different one with others -- this is a remarkable opportunity to truly assess these different characters which make you such a rich, rich being of emotions and creativity and diversity.
You see, you yourself are highly diverse! If you view your conflicted identities as great diversity, you can have a much, much, much better relationship with any beingwhom you meet, because you can recognize that characteristic -- and that opposite viewpoints residing in the same being, as being similar to your own life!
It is in a way of beginning of a kind of "gestalt intelligence"; a kind of awareness that you are a multidimensional being of many multidimensional experiences, and in some belief systems, multidimensional lives, lived in different ways, in the same way that you know you have lived many roles in this life.
Key here is love. It is very simple. You must love those opposing parts of you who are conflicted. You must love yourself when you want to take Path A, and you must love yourself just as deeply when you want to take Path B. Or when you feel very differently from one day to the next. You must love yourself. You must affirm yourself. You must be thoughtful about yourself and your own feelings.
When you "beat yourself up," the effect on your physical body and your spirit, your excitement about life -- is no different than when someone else does it, so powerfully are you interconnected with all other beings.
Therefore, be highly loving about yourself. And you can be highly loving about other beings. And that in itself is a resolution of conflict. Because any being who sees "love" coming toward them will have a very difficult time maintaining an impatient or abrupt or uncivil state of mind.
You see, you are after that state of mind and that state of heart, if you truly want to handle conflicting identities or even experimental identities that you play with every day.
So, this is just the beginning of this discussion, which is related to being a being of greater creative intelligence, than would normally be your consideration for daily life...beginning to asses this great love of all the people that you are, all of the people that you carry in your heart. And beginning to feel a tug on that heart when you meet a new person or you see someone with whom there is a conflict. If you will just open your heart, your very multidimensional heart, to that being, with love -- you will see with eyes of interconnectedness instead of with eyes of judgment, with eyes of mistrust, with eyes of fear...
This place of peace begins with the love of yourself, all of the selves and all of the opinions and all of the beings that you are. And then feeling that same love toward every being in your life, of every age, of every culture, of every experience. Everyone, every thing, every event is a great lesson, is a great gift, and deserves your highest love in a truly eternal way.
For you see each thought that you have, each judgment that you have about a particular conflict or idea is truly eternal. And if your frame of reference can only be this life, then notice how often something will come back to you that happened when you were a tiny child.
And be very, very thoughtful of every tiny child that you come into contact with. For this child is building years and years and years of memories and feelings. And you can contribute powerfully to a presence of love that will help them in future generations handle conflict differently.
So, you see why it is so important for you to deeply lover yourself.
Now, we have a meditation on love -- 5 Levels of Love. (See Meditation-Sound Page for this meditation.)
I would like for you to do this Meditation on 5 Levels of Love in this way: Meditate on 5 Levels of Love of Yourself.
Now, if you can do this and then you take time to think about, to journal, to write or draw some of the things that came to you during this experience of meditating on love of yourself, all of the beings you are, then you open the door to a higher multidimensional conscious awareness.
And you can apply that same higher multidimensional awareness to your communications with other beings, regardless of their belief systems or any other quality that you might ordinarily judge.
Let us begin to drop the judgments and grow the common ground. Let us begin to truly love others as we love ourselves...
-- Grandmother from Another Planet